Goodnight and happy last day of summer...
Wish I can be back here. *man I miss those sunglasses*
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
8/31/10 Last Day of Summer
Today was the last day of summer. Hence the title. I will try to make this short because I have to wake up early tomorrow; 6:15 am early. ( Ugh) But not making any promises. To begin with, today was a pretty dreary day for the last day of summer. Maybe it was natures way of getting me ready to leave, because if it was any nicer out I don't think I would be able to. For the first half of the day I woke up at the early hours of 9:00. I moped around on Facebook hoping for some kind of comments or messages, then I watched some stand up comedy and did a few chores. The thing that got me out of my bad day funk was when I realized I had to return a few CDs to the library this means I got a chance to get up on my bike. At the end of my trip of returning my CDs and looking for my favorite hair product that for some reason is not being sold anywhere any more I was alot more alive for work at 3:30. Work was slow and mainly consists of cleaning. Which is what is done more than anything else in the store. When I got home I talked to MawMaw for a half an hour explaining her my blog. I wonder if she will ever read this..... Well anyways sorry for the half ass blog today. I guess with school coming up my brain isn't all here today.
Monday, August 30, 2010
8/30/2010 Cheers
I am sipping a hot cup of organic herbal tea at the stroke of midnight quickly reflecting on my summer. This summer has been great. Starting with my annual trip up to Rachaels' cabin up in northern Minnesota, where we play poker, watch movies, roast marshmallows, and tan on the dock because the water is to cold. This trip is something I look forward to every year. But each year is not for sure until she makes her choice on who to ask up. Its been me sense 5th grade, but every year I still wonder who she is going to pick. Though every time I'm up at the cabin I treat it like its my last.
After the cabin we didn't lay low for long because less than a week later was the Joan Jett concert. That has to have been the best night of my life. I was high off the music while the girl in front of me was high off of LSD or something. Its okay though, I was feeling the love also. Joan Jett really connected with the crowd. I could have sworn we looked straight into each others eyes.
For a week it was just me, and maybe a few get-togethers here and there. Then I was off to my MawMaws' house for a few days. One of the days I spent with my two younger cousins Delany and Isabel. Delany is 12 and Isabel is 8.... I think. That day we spent the day up at lake Michigan. The weather was so hot but the lake was really cold, this created a fog that rolled over the beach for most of our stay. It was beautiful. I even played in the water.
After that, the next week I started drivers ed. This lasted three weeks. The class went from 8 am to 10. It was boring and surprisingly difficult in some areas. I passed. For the second week of drivers ed I also had band camp. This means my day went from 8 am to 4 pm. Longer than a school day. Band camp was uneventful this year because we can no longer do a field show and alot of the fun seniors graduated. I guess its my turn to be fun. The third week of drivers ed was finishing up and I had my first Sax Lesson and started getting alot more hours for work.
In the first two weeks of August I was over in New Jersey and New York. The first week I was hitting the streets of NYC with my Aunt Alison and the second week I was doing all sorts of what-nots with my cousins Kimberly (19) and Liza ( Just a few weeks older than me, 16). We picked up and organized trash up at McGleens race track and I tagged along while they worked the sailboat races. I also visited my other Grandparent; Grammy and Grandy in Corning, NY. The one thing I really wish I would have done when I was up there was to spend more time with them. I find them very interesting to listen to and they have so many stories and facts packed away in their brains that I think its good for them to let it out. I also look up to them alot because they have done so many great things in their life time that it makes everyone else, even the president look under achieved. I am not stretching the truth either, they are so amazing. Grandy designed the very tea pot I used to heat up my tea tonight. He has biked many miles, I would love to go on a bike ride with him. Any ways I could right a book about them. Going on....On my way home I drove for about 500 miles going on average 85 mph dominating the left lane. It was great.
The last few weeks have gone by so fast. I mainly just caught up with all my friends, worked, and road my bike. Other than the day of Ke$ha the whole summer I had not been truly sad. I had an end of the summer party which I hope that people had fun at. At the party there was plenty of food, badminton, music, and games. But it was a little weird because I had invited two different groups of people and I just couldn't get them to mesh. It was the strangest thing. So I insisted on us all playing Apples to Apples. That was a good ice breaker, but once the game ended people still didn't really mesh. Thats ok I guess. I like them all, but will never leave my main group. Tomorrow ( or should I say today) Is my last day of summer. I am free until 3:30pm then I am off to work. So cheers to a great year, a great summer, and hopefully another great year ahead.
Cheers! *sips last of my tea*
After the cabin we didn't lay low for long because less than a week later was the Joan Jett concert. That has to have been the best night of my life. I was high off the music while the girl in front of me was high off of LSD or something. Its okay though, I was feeling the love also. Joan Jett really connected with the crowd. I could have sworn we looked straight into each others eyes.
For a week it was just me, and maybe a few get-togethers here and there. Then I was off to my MawMaws' house for a few days. One of the days I spent with my two younger cousins Delany and Isabel. Delany is 12 and Isabel is 8.... I think. That day we spent the day up at lake Michigan. The weather was so hot but the lake was really cold, this created a fog that rolled over the beach for most of our stay. It was beautiful. I even played in the water.
After that, the next week I started drivers ed. This lasted three weeks. The class went from 8 am to 10. It was boring and surprisingly difficult in some areas. I passed. For the second week of drivers ed I also had band camp. This means my day went from 8 am to 4 pm. Longer than a school day. Band camp was uneventful this year because we can no longer do a field show and alot of the fun seniors graduated. I guess its my turn to be fun. The third week of drivers ed was finishing up and I had my first Sax Lesson and started getting alot more hours for work.
In the first two weeks of August I was over in New Jersey and New York. The first week I was hitting the streets of NYC with my Aunt Alison and the second week I was doing all sorts of what-nots with my cousins Kimberly (19) and Liza ( Just a few weeks older than me, 16). We picked up and organized trash up at McGleens race track and I tagged along while they worked the sailboat races. I also visited my other Grandparent; Grammy and Grandy in Corning, NY. The one thing I really wish I would have done when I was up there was to spend more time with them. I find them very interesting to listen to and they have so many stories and facts packed away in their brains that I think its good for them to let it out. I also look up to them alot because they have done so many great things in their life time that it makes everyone else, even the president look under achieved. I am not stretching the truth either, they are so amazing. Grandy designed the very tea pot I used to heat up my tea tonight. He has biked many miles, I would love to go on a bike ride with him. Any ways I could right a book about them. Going on....On my way home I drove for about 500 miles going on average 85 mph dominating the left lane. It was great.
The last few weeks have gone by so fast. I mainly just caught up with all my friends, worked, and road my bike. Other than the day of Ke$ha the whole summer I had not been truly sad. I had an end of the summer party which I hope that people had fun at. At the party there was plenty of food, badminton, music, and games. But it was a little weird because I had invited two different groups of people and I just couldn't get them to mesh. It was the strangest thing. So I insisted on us all playing Apples to Apples. That was a good ice breaker, but once the game ended people still didn't really mesh. Thats ok I guess. I like them all, but will never leave my main group. Tomorrow ( or should I say today) Is my last day of summer. I am free until 3:30pm then I am off to work. So cheers to a great year, a great summer, and hopefully another great year ahead.
Cheers! *sips last of my tea*
Sunday, August 29, 2010
8/29/2010 Movie Trap
I love movies. I just love to watch them. I have Netflix which is the best thing ever because I can get movies in the mail or watch some on my computer. Sometimes I will find myself watching really crappy movies but I will still somewhat enjoy it. It helps me unwind and relax. Especially if i had a bad day or if the weathers bad a movie puts me in a good mood. Ever sense I started writing this blog I have been having less time to watch a movie. Which if fine I guess. I mean writing is better for your brain than watching a movie, but still its been awhile.
Your probably wondering what my favorite movie is aren't you. Well if you weren't I'm still going to tell you. I have a list of top movies. But I am going to narrow it down to two. One is The Runaways. It has two of the best actresses of my generation Kristen Stewart and Dacoda Fanning. They did an amazing job playing Joan Jett and Cherie Curry. The music in it is great, the acting is great, everything about that movies is Amazing!! And thats an understatement. Another of my favorite movies is a long time favorite of mine. Its kinda cheesy, predicable, and the acting is ok. But its been my favorite sense I was very young. The movie is The Parent Trap. I have watched that movie more than any other. Every time I'm really sad about something or need some kind of pick-me-up that movie was there for me. With Linsay Lohan playing Hallie and Annie; The twins that switch places, and RIP, Natasha Richard playing Elizabeth James Annie's mom and a wedding gown designer. The movie is both cute and funny.
I realized just recently that a lot of the choices I made when I was younger had a lot of similarities. I was obsessed with getting a golden retriever; Hallie had a golden retriever named Sammy. I fenced; When Annie and Hallie first meet is at the end of a fencing match and the see each other for the first time. I had a pursuit to get cloud button up pajamas just like Hallie wore when she came up with the " Brilliant beyond brilliant idea". I even got my hair cut like them at one point. And when I made those choices none of them I really thought I want to this Just like the movie. No thats just what I wanted and It wasn't until now that I see how similar they are to the movie.
I still watch the movie to this day. And I still can't figure out why it is so close to me, and why I love it so much. I bet I have a twin out there that lives in England!
This is Hallie, one of my closest friends. We've been friends sense we were very little...
before the movie came out. I <3 U!
Your probably wondering what my favorite movie is aren't you. Well if you weren't I'm still going to tell you. I have a list of top movies. But I am going to narrow it down to two. One is The Runaways. It has two of the best actresses of my generation Kristen Stewart and Dacoda Fanning. They did an amazing job playing Joan Jett and Cherie Curry. The music in it is great, the acting is great, everything about that movies is Amazing!! And thats an understatement. Another of my favorite movies is a long time favorite of mine. Its kinda cheesy, predicable, and the acting is ok. But its been my favorite sense I was very young. The movie is The Parent Trap. I have watched that movie more than any other. Every time I'm really sad about something or need some kind of pick-me-up that movie was there for me. With Linsay Lohan playing Hallie and Annie; The twins that switch places, and RIP, Natasha Richard playing Elizabeth James Annie's mom and a wedding gown designer. The movie is both cute and funny.
I realized just recently that a lot of the choices I made when I was younger had a lot of similarities. I was obsessed with getting a golden retriever; Hallie had a golden retriever named Sammy. I fenced; When Annie and Hallie first meet is at the end of a fencing match and the see each other for the first time. I had a pursuit to get cloud button up pajamas just like Hallie wore when she came up with the " Brilliant beyond brilliant idea". I even got my hair cut like them at one point. And when I made those choices none of them I really thought I want to this Just like the movie. No thats just what I wanted and It wasn't until now that I see how similar they are to the movie.
I still watch the movie to this day. And I still can't figure out why it is so close to me, and why I love it so much. I bet I have a twin out there that lives in England!
before the movie came out. I <3 U!
Saturday, August 28, 2010
8/28/10 Things I Love
This blog post is simple and will most likely come up again. In this blog I am going to talk about things I love. Starting with the number one thing I love. My friends. Though many change, some stay the same and are with you for years. Just thinking about that bond and the laughs you've had makes me smile. One of my dearest friends just said goodbye to her sister who went off to collage today. I really wish I can just give her a hug and make her feel better. But she should feel grateful to have a sister that is like her best friend. I hope I have at least one friend that would stick around and be my sister. And someday I will be someone's fake aunt. I hope so, I need an excuse not to have kids. I also love my family. Even though its a small and dysfunctional at times. I still love them. I mean we are blood. My Aunt Alison is there for me no matter what. She and I, I consider best friends. We can talk about anything. She I can always count on for advise and to just listen and help me out. I wish I could see her more often; once a year is just not enough. I end up crying every time we leave each other. Also my MawMaw and I are also very close. Though I wont talk about everything to her we are still there looking out for each other. We can have a good time; just the two of us. I am lucky to have this with my grandma when most people don't.
Next thing that I love the most is my new hair cut that I got today. It turned out great! I am so happy about it. I love tea, the taste is so elegant, but I actually don't really understand why I love tea so much; I just do. Also my new bike tires. They are so bitchn'. I got myself going faster than a car going down main street. It was so amazing. Biking makes me feel so free; I really love it. The wind blowing in my face and feeling like you can go anywhere. Its better than driving a car. I also love my room. My room I consider so personal to me. Everything in it is just ME. I think of my room as one big piece of art. Random things are placed in just the right spot. To me its perfect. Love comes in a big form with my pets. They don't speak but they all have personalities, the interact with there environment. Just watching them makes me think of how close we are to them. How humans ARE animals. I believe animals love just as we do.
Next thing that I love the most is my new hair cut that I got today. It turned out great! I am so happy about it. I love tea, the taste is so elegant, but I actually don't really understand why I love tea so much; I just do. Also my new bike tires. They are so bitchn'. I got myself going faster than a car going down main street. It was so amazing. Biking makes me feel so free; I really love it. The wind blowing in my face and feeling like you can go anywhere. Its better than driving a car. I also love my room. My room I consider so personal to me. Everything in it is just ME. I think of my room as one big piece of art. Random things are placed in just the right spot. To me its perfect. Love comes in a big form with my pets. They don't speak but they all have personalities, the interact with there environment. Just watching them makes me think of how close we are to them. How humans ARE animals. I believe animals love just as we do.
Friday, August 27, 2010
8/27/10 Post Worst Day Ever
So, yesterday was basically one of those "OMG THIS IS THE WORST DAY EVER!" kinda days. Anything that could have gone wrong, went wrong. Remember back in the posting, "Year of the concerts" I said that on August 26th I was going to see Ke$ha. The concert I gave as a gift. Well the person who I gave the gift to couldn't go. ( btw I spent $80 total on them). This is because of my boss. Who sometimes makes me mad because of this reason. In the end, the whole reason is a long story; even too long for a blog.
All in all I had to find someone to go with, so I asked around. Then found that my friend Hannah wanted to go. This was cool, I was excited.. lets do this; right? Wrong. Concert started at 7, Hannah had a tennis match at 4:30, which was fine until the other teams bus broke down. Meaning the match went late over all Hannah couldn't make it. So it was me and my fifty something year old dad. ( I know his real age) He was the oldest one there, people noticed. The concert was general admission and I am on the floor with 200 other strangers all waiting for Ke$ha. In the mean time they are playing bad D.Jed tech-no music and screaming the same thing over and over again trying to keep the crowd pumped up. I am hot, tired, and pissed off that the original plan didn't work out. So this goes on for an hour. I am being tossed around like a beach ball in hot sun. A group of girls next to me snuck in alcohol; obviously under aged. One got so waisted she almost puked on my shoes.
Another hour later still no show of Ke$ha and same crap-o music. They even repeated songs thats how poor the selection was. Its been two hours and five minutes and I have had it. I was not having a good time one bit, so we left. That was that. Never saw Ke$ha. Just paid $80 for me and my dad to be tortured. I couldn't see shit anyways. We walked out. I cried; a little. Then we to Culvers to eat, and went home. I wish I would have cried myself to sleep so I could have felt way better in the morning. Instead I tossed and turned and woke up 4 times during the night.
Today I worked all day. I didn't get a lunch break or any kind of break. Once I got out into the sun on my way to work I felt a little better. Once my boss said I didn't sweep well enough; not last time I worked, but whatever time I swiped last ( she remembers *ugh!*). I felt worse again. I hated her again. blahbalhablaha. Then I went to Becca's and played RockBand. That was fun
So, yeah, This posting kinda sucks, but I needed to write something. I can't stop now on posting once a day...... Is it normal that I can make my stomach look pregnant even if all I had was a glass of water.... I must have a lot of air in there. Tomorrow I hope to bike to Becca's and back. She probably wont be there but its a good 15 mile ride total; there and back. Also tomorrow is my end of the summer party. I wonder who's all going to make it. And the BIG hair cut tomorrow. Im nervous.
Good Night. I will talk to you tomorrow. tomorrow. its only a day away....
Chocolate is the taste.....
Sun is the touch......
Laughter is the sound.....
A smile is the sight.....
To Happiness
All in all I had to find someone to go with, so I asked around. Then found that my friend Hannah wanted to go. This was cool, I was excited.. lets do this; right? Wrong. Concert started at 7, Hannah had a tennis match at 4:30, which was fine until the other teams bus broke down. Meaning the match went late over all Hannah couldn't make it. So it was me and my fifty something year old dad. ( I know his real age) He was the oldest one there, people noticed. The concert was general admission and I am on the floor with 200 other strangers all waiting for Ke$ha. In the mean time they are playing bad D.Jed tech-no music and screaming the same thing over and over again trying to keep the crowd pumped up. I am hot, tired, and pissed off that the original plan didn't work out. So this goes on for an hour. I am being tossed around like a beach ball in hot sun. A group of girls next to me snuck in alcohol; obviously under aged. One got so waisted she almost puked on my shoes.
Another hour later still no show of Ke$ha and same crap-o music. They even repeated songs thats how poor the selection was. Its been two hours and five minutes and I have had it. I was not having a good time one bit, so we left. That was that. Never saw Ke$ha. Just paid $80 for me and my dad to be tortured. I couldn't see shit anyways. We walked out. I cried; a little. Then we to Culvers to eat, and went home. I wish I would have cried myself to sleep so I could have felt way better in the morning. Instead I tossed and turned and woke up 4 times during the night.
Today I worked all day. I didn't get a lunch break or any kind of break. Once I got out into the sun on my way to work I felt a little better. Once my boss said I didn't sweep well enough; not last time I worked, but whatever time I swiped last ( she remembers *ugh!*). I felt worse again. I hated her again. blahbalhablaha. Then I went to Becca's and played RockBand. That was fun
So, yeah, This posting kinda sucks, but I needed to write something. I can't stop now on posting once a day...... Is it normal that I can make my stomach look pregnant even if all I had was a glass of water.... I must have a lot of air in there. Tomorrow I hope to bike to Becca's and back. She probably wont be there but its a good 15 mile ride total; there and back. Also tomorrow is my end of the summer party. I wonder who's all going to make it. And the BIG hair cut tomorrow. Im nervous.
Chocolate is the taste.....
Sun is the touch......
Laughter is the sound.....
A smile is the sight.....
To Happiness
Thursday, August 26, 2010
8/26/10 I Hate People Who Hate People
I'm not really a religious person. I'm sure if you put all my beliefs into a category and added them together and put a 'ist' at the end of it you probably could label me with something. If you ask me how the earth began I would say the Big Bang, but yet I believe in ghosts, sometimes I believe that you go somewhere when you die, but most of the time I believe that dying is a lot like being in a deep sleep.
Any ways what I discovered is that I find some religion very hateful. Especially that evangelical religious groups that buy all there members with fun trips to theme parks and camps that play rock music about the lord and are really hardcore about getting people to join and listen. I am not saying it bad to have faith. Actually its good to have faith, whatever makes you wake up in the morning saying today is a good day, works. What I mean by hateful is that when I am asked about if I go to church on sundays and say no, I have been talked to about the lord and told that I am going to hell if I don't believe in God or if I am not baptized. Then they talk about loving your neighbor, but if your neighbor is Gay, or Muslim, or Atheist, that their going to hell. Why can't people just let it go. Everyone is wrong! Ok? Most wars are started over religion, its a waist of time an energy to convert people. There are hundreds of religions out there and they all think their just as right as the next. I mean I'm sure I'm wrong about what whatever I believe to.
I have friends of all sorts of religion. And thats fine as long as we don't talk about anything that has to do with anything that gets into their religion. But I have had arguments with one that thought that being gay is like being a crack baby. No joke, this is what they thought. I was furious! Or when I over heard someone talking about how a woman should just stay home and cook. I just bit my tongue and had to just walk away.
In away I am being hypocritical. I mean I am complaining about religions that complain about people. But when I am watching a reality TV show and there talking about God in an episode, or if people tell me God will be with you or I am praying for you. I am fine with that. Actually thats their way of saying I care for you and I am looking after you. So peace, love, and happiness. And next time you see someone thats different from you, except who they are. You don't have to be friends with them.
Any ways what I discovered is that I find some religion very hateful. Especially that evangelical religious groups that buy all there members with fun trips to theme parks and camps that play rock music about the lord and are really hardcore about getting people to join and listen. I am not saying it bad to have faith. Actually its good to have faith, whatever makes you wake up in the morning saying today is a good day, works. What I mean by hateful is that when I am asked about if I go to church on sundays and say no, I have been talked to about the lord and told that I am going to hell if I don't believe in God or if I am not baptized. Then they talk about loving your neighbor, but if your neighbor is Gay, or Muslim, or Atheist, that their going to hell. Why can't people just let it go. Everyone is wrong! Ok? Most wars are started over religion, its a waist of time an energy to convert people. There are hundreds of religions out there and they all think their just as right as the next. I mean I'm sure I'm wrong about what whatever I believe to.
I have friends of all sorts of religion. And thats fine as long as we don't talk about anything that has to do with anything that gets into their religion. But I have had arguments with one that thought that being gay is like being a crack baby. No joke, this is what they thought. I was furious! Or when I over heard someone talking about how a woman should just stay home and cook. I just bit my tongue and had to just walk away.
In away I am being hypocritical. I mean I am complaining about religions that complain about people. But when I am watching a reality TV show and there talking about God in an episode, or if people tell me God will be with you or I am praying for you. I am fine with that. Actually thats their way of saying I care for you and I am looking after you. So peace, love, and happiness. And next time you see someone thats different from you, except who they are. You don't have to be friends with them.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
8/25/10 The Future
Coming into junior year makes you think a lot about the future. I mean the thought is practically forced into your head. "What are you going to be?", "Where are you going to go to collage?", questions like that are asked all the time. For me though, thinking about the future is second nature. I am always planning ahead, not saying I don't like surprises ;], but I am always planning for something because for me thats how I know things will get done.
When I was younger I knew exactly what I wanted to do when I grew up.... kind of. Well at first I wanted to be a race car driver and a veterinarian on the side. Then I realized that wont work so I wanted to be a veterinarian and a race car driver on the side. Later I dropped the whole race car driver thing and stuck with being a vet. In 8th grade I got to job shadow a veterinarian, after that I decided maybe a vet tech will be more fun. So that was my plan, to go to MATC and become a veterinarian technician. One day this year I woke up and realized that that's not what I wanted to do. It was like I was a cartoon that got bonked in the head and forgot who I was. This scared me. I was always that person who knew what wanted to be; and now for once in my life I had no idea. So for months I've been running around like a chicken with its head cut off; not a clue where I was going and what I was doing. For me, this was a very scary thing. Everything felt so spacey and weird. So I wrote down every occupation I thought about being. And here it is....
1. Dog Groomer
2. Dog Trainer
3. Vet Tech
4. Pet Nutritionists
5. Pet Therapy
6. Fashion Designer
7. Costumer Designer
8. Dog Walker ( in NYC of corse)
9. Club Owner
10. Phycology (there is something interesting about it; I don't know what it is)
11. Movie Production
12. Music......
13. Massage Therapist
14. Advertising
Then I was talking with my aunt. Both my aunt and my dad said the same thing. They said they think I should stick with the vet tech thing. This messed me up at first. I mean I just got over the break up of me and that career idea, and now your saying I should get back together with it. I didn't like this at first. I was pretty content on being in advertising. They said thats a tuff business to get into. So I thought, and thought, and tossed and turned. Then I came up with the perfect plan. How about I go to MATC which is now MAC. But same thing... moving on... and go and become a vet tech ( like plan A) but then once I become a vet tech and get a job as one I will be able to afford to go to collage and get a communications degree in advertising. That way I can be both a vet tech until I get a good advertising job then I can be that and make the big bucks! Great right?... I was pretty proud of it.
The thing is I have this plan. And I have a general idea how to get there. But why do I still have this empty feeling of being lost. Like I don't KNOW...... I feel like, like, well I feel confused. I don't really know what to do; and I don't know when this feeling will ever go away. A part of me thinks that even if I have a successful career, an apartment in New York City and a chocolate brown standard poodle that I take for runs with my bike around central park; that I will still have this feeling, late at night. A feeling of; something missing.
When I was younger I knew exactly what I wanted to do when I grew up.... kind of. Well at first I wanted to be a race car driver and a veterinarian on the side. Then I realized that wont work so I wanted to be a veterinarian and a race car driver on the side. Later I dropped the whole race car driver thing and stuck with being a vet. In 8th grade I got to job shadow a veterinarian, after that I decided maybe a vet tech will be more fun. So that was my plan, to go to MATC and become a veterinarian technician. One day this year I woke up and realized that that's not what I wanted to do. It was like I was a cartoon that got bonked in the head and forgot who I was. This scared me. I was always that person who knew what wanted to be; and now for once in my life I had no idea. So for months I've been running around like a chicken with its head cut off; not a clue where I was going and what I was doing. For me, this was a very scary thing. Everything felt so spacey and weird. So I wrote down every occupation I thought about being. And here it is....
1. Dog Groomer
2. Dog Trainer
3. Vet Tech
4. Pet Nutritionists
5. Pet Therapy
6. Fashion Designer
7. Costumer Designer
8. Dog Walker ( in NYC of corse)
9. Club Owner
10. Phycology (there is something interesting about it; I don't know what it is)
11. Movie Production
12. Music......
13. Massage Therapist
14. Advertising
Then I was talking with my aunt. Both my aunt and my dad said the same thing. They said they think I should stick with the vet tech thing. This messed me up at first. I mean I just got over the break up of me and that career idea, and now your saying I should get back together with it. I didn't like this at first. I was pretty content on being in advertising. They said thats a tuff business to get into. So I thought, and thought, and tossed and turned. Then I came up with the perfect plan. How about I go to MATC which is now MAC. But same thing... moving on... and go and become a vet tech ( like plan A) but then once I become a vet tech and get a job as one I will be able to afford to go to collage and get a communications degree in advertising. That way I can be both a vet tech until I get a good advertising job then I can be that and make the big bucks! Great right?... I was pretty proud of it.
The thing is I have this plan. And I have a general idea how to get there. But why do I still have this empty feeling of being lost. Like I don't KNOW...... I feel like, like, well I feel confused. I don't really know what to do; and I don't know when this feeling will ever go away. A part of me thinks that even if I have a successful career, an apartment in New York City and a chocolate brown standard poodle that I take for runs with my bike around central park; that I will still have this feeling, late at night. A feeling of; something missing.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
8/24/10 Sports, Sports, Sports
From a young age I have always been active. I was always running around doing something. I took most of my energy out in sports. Starting at the young age of four (thats a guestamet age) I started swimming lessons. Swimming lessons continued on up until I was ten. I had to repeat a level twice because the instructor said I wasn't focused enough to move on to the next level. "Natalea focus!" I still hear this at least once a week to this day.
When I was five or maybe six, i don't know, my mom put me soccer. I did not like soccer one bit. It was hot, tiring and I never got the ball. I just spent my time looking for four leaf clovers on the field as the other kids attempted to score a goal. This event was rare. I stuck with that for at the most three years. Im leaning towards two. In second and third grade I was in dance, I was also a real tomboy back then and hated the fact that we had to where pink for our recitals. I regret quitting dance for such a stupid reason like that, especially sense I love to do it now. But what can I do I was six years old and my parents let me. Also in third grade; this would make me seven; I started fencing. If you are wondering what fencing is, this is a sport where two people have a long slender sward and score points if they stab the other person ( no one bleeds of corse). I was pretty good at this and continued this sport up until i believe 7th grade. Reason for discontinuing; the first reason is that out of four years of doing the sport I had only competed twice, and for all that practice it was unsatisfying. The second reason is that well I wanted to do hockey.
My friend was in hockey and turned me on to the sport. I loved it. We had games every weekend. Practice was fun. I got to meet new people, and when you play you get like an adrenaline rush, a rush that I never had before. First I was on a U19 girls team with my friend. Then, even though we were just a few months apart, I was apparently kick off the team the next year for being too young so I had to join a peewee team, this kinda sucked because most of the boys were ass holes to me and there was checking. ( checking is when you are allowed to slam someone else into the boards). Though, I still loved playing. A year later a new girls team was formed. I was on this team for two years. I had some good times and bad. Two things that I heard from my coaches the most was "Natalea focus!" and "be aggressive". Which I am not an aggressive person. Your probably wondering why I am not doing hockey anymore. I have two very good reasons why, though I loved it, I had to do what I had to do. In 8th grade my dad lost his job, and as you might know hockey is a very expensive sport and also after 9th grade (this is when me being younger was good because I could be in it one more year) I would have to be on the MSO Iceberg high school team. This is a combination of four schools. Most people in it had been playing longer than I and I wasn't going to have my parents pay money that we don't have to have me sit on a bench. Now, do you think those are good reasons?
In fifth through ninth grade during the summer I did softball. I enjoyed it. I never really was in love with it. And got annoyed that I was always put in the out field but I liked it. Even though I was a complete and utter strike out. Hitting the ball I found was nearly impossible. Like hockey it was a great sport to meet new people and to fill up free time. How it ended do you ask. Well it ended with a horrible new coach and an age limit that I reached to be on the team. It was time to go.
This is not the end of my sports career, oh no. In 10th grade, sense I wasn't doing hockey I had to stay somewhat in shape, so I decide to do track. In track we practiced after school ever day for a little over two hours. We have track meets once to twice a week. They put me in the 100, 200, and the 400. I hated it. I hated practice, and I hated the meets. It was torture. I ended up getting shin splints in the beginning and they never went away, they just got worse. To the point that no matter if I stood or sat it hurt the same. Also I was the slowest person on the track team. Literally the word slowest was written next to my name on the list. Im never going to do track again.
So what are you going to do this year, your probably wondering. Well, good question. So I forgot to mention up in the beginning that sometime in that mess of sports I also took tennis lessons for two years. It was ok. But nothing I truly enjoyed. Until we did tennis in gym class last year, and I had myself a good time playing tennis; it never occurred to me to play. So I said Im joining and that was that. I know friends that are in it, so even during the boring times I will be with someone. Later I sent in in all my forms and everything except for the $50 fee. A few days before the month of August we got our schedule. For me this was too late. Practice was everyday in August plus some matches. My boss had already had my work schedule planned and my times that I had to work interfered with the tennis times. So I emailed the coach asking if I could miss a few practices for work. She, with no sympathy, said that work is not an excuse to miss practice and if I miss more than two practices because of it I would be kicked off the team.
Heart broken as I was I went to my.... *11:11 MAKE A WISH*.... I went to my long time companion. An activity that I never thought was a sport, but I just love to do it. It was there for me when the others weren't but always made me happy. Almost everyone knows how to do it but only few know how to completely indulge in it. If you guessed swimming you are wrong. Well for me at least, you could be a swimmer, but I am a biker. Or the proper term is cyclist. I can ride for hours, wind in my hair, I can go fast or I can just cruz down the road. I love to bike. So sense I love to bike and technically biking is a sport and you can even race. That is what I am going to do. My dads friend is a big time cyclist and owns the bike shop; so I believe he can give me the guidance I need to become really good. Just the other weekend I rode around Lake Mondoda with my mom, it was 15 miles and we did it in 2 hours. ( I can go faster but my mom is a little slower than me). In the end I really believed that I can be a good biker. Its in my blood. My grandpa is 78 years old and he is still biking over 10 miles a day. I wish I could bike with him.
So all in all I have done eight sports, yet I have never been really good at any of them. I tried hard, but sports just come harder to me than others. My dad says I'm not athletic, but yet I have done all theses sports. So what do you call a person that does sports but is not good at any of them? My aunt says that I am an active person. Someone who needs to do something active even if they aren't good at it. What do you think?
When I was five or maybe six, i don't know, my mom put me soccer. I did not like soccer one bit. It was hot, tiring and I never got the ball. I just spent my time looking for four leaf clovers on the field as the other kids attempted to score a goal. This event was rare. I stuck with that for at the most three years. Im leaning towards two. In second and third grade I was in dance, I was also a real tomboy back then and hated the fact that we had to where pink for our recitals. I regret quitting dance for such a stupid reason like that, especially sense I love to do it now. But what can I do I was six years old and my parents let me. Also in third grade; this would make me seven; I started fencing. If you are wondering what fencing is, this is a sport where two people have a long slender sward and score points if they stab the other person ( no one bleeds of corse). I was pretty good at this and continued this sport up until i believe 7th grade. Reason for discontinuing; the first reason is that out of four years of doing the sport I had only competed twice, and for all that practice it was unsatisfying. The second reason is that well I wanted to do hockey.
My friend was in hockey and turned me on to the sport. I loved it. We had games every weekend. Practice was fun. I got to meet new people, and when you play you get like an adrenaline rush, a rush that I never had before. First I was on a U19 girls team with my friend. Then, even though we were just a few months apart, I was apparently kick off the team the next year for being too young so I had to join a peewee team, this kinda sucked because most of the boys were ass holes to me and there was checking. ( checking is when you are allowed to slam someone else into the boards). Though, I still loved playing. A year later a new girls team was formed. I was on this team for two years. I had some good times and bad. Two things that I heard from my coaches the most was "Natalea focus!" and "be aggressive". Which I am not an aggressive person. Your probably wondering why I am not doing hockey anymore. I have two very good reasons why, though I loved it, I had to do what I had to do. In 8th grade my dad lost his job, and as you might know hockey is a very expensive sport and also after 9th grade (this is when me being younger was good because I could be in it one more year) I would have to be on the MSO Iceberg high school team. This is a combination of four schools. Most people in it had been playing longer than I and I wasn't going to have my parents pay money that we don't have to have me sit on a bench. Now, do you think those are good reasons?
In fifth through ninth grade during the summer I did softball. I enjoyed it. I never really was in love with it. And got annoyed that I was always put in the out field but I liked it. Even though I was a complete and utter strike out. Hitting the ball I found was nearly impossible. Like hockey it was a great sport to meet new people and to fill up free time. How it ended do you ask. Well it ended with a horrible new coach and an age limit that I reached to be on the team. It was time to go.
This is not the end of my sports career, oh no. In 10th grade, sense I wasn't doing hockey I had to stay somewhat in shape, so I decide to do track. In track we practiced after school ever day for a little over two hours. We have track meets once to twice a week. They put me in the 100, 200, and the 400. I hated it. I hated practice, and I hated the meets. It was torture. I ended up getting shin splints in the beginning and they never went away, they just got worse. To the point that no matter if I stood or sat it hurt the same. Also I was the slowest person on the track team. Literally the word slowest was written next to my name on the list. Im never going to do track again.
So what are you going to do this year, your probably wondering. Well, good question. So I forgot to mention up in the beginning that sometime in that mess of sports I also took tennis lessons for two years. It was ok. But nothing I truly enjoyed. Until we did tennis in gym class last year, and I had myself a good time playing tennis; it never occurred to me to play. So I said Im joining and that was that. I know friends that are in it, so even during the boring times I will be with someone. Later I sent in in all my forms and everything except for the $50 fee. A few days before the month of August we got our schedule. For me this was too late. Practice was everyday in August plus some matches. My boss had already had my work schedule planned and my times that I had to work interfered with the tennis times. So I emailed the coach asking if I could miss a few practices for work. She, with no sympathy, said that work is not an excuse to miss practice and if I miss more than two practices because of it I would be kicked off the team.
Heart broken as I was I went to my.... *11:11 MAKE A WISH*.... I went to my long time companion. An activity that I never thought was a sport, but I just love to do it. It was there for me when the others weren't but always made me happy. Almost everyone knows how to do it but only few know how to completely indulge in it. If you guessed swimming you are wrong. Well for me at least, you could be a swimmer, but I am a biker. Or the proper term is cyclist. I can ride for hours, wind in my hair, I can go fast or I can just cruz down the road. I love to bike. So sense I love to bike and technically biking is a sport and you can even race. That is what I am going to do. My dads friend is a big time cyclist and owns the bike shop; so I believe he can give me the guidance I need to become really good. Just the other weekend I rode around Lake Mondoda with my mom, it was 15 miles and we did it in 2 hours. ( I can go faster but my mom is a little slower than me). In the end I really believed that I can be a good biker. Its in my blood. My grandpa is 78 years old and he is still biking over 10 miles a day. I wish I could bike with him.
So all in all I have done eight sports, yet I have never been really good at any of them. I tried hard, but sports just come harder to me than others. My dad says I'm not athletic, but yet I have done all theses sports. So what do you call a person that does sports but is not good at any of them? My aunt says that I am an active person. Someone who needs to do something active even if they aren't good at it. What do you think?
Monday, August 23, 2010
8/23/10 The Year of the Music
This year as been the best year of my 16 year old life. I've never been happier. Reasoning is not for certain. It helps that I have learned a new way of thinking or the key to happiness. I think. Whatever it is I hope it sticks around for awhile. Other than my new found happiness something new has happened. The gift of music.
I've always liked music, but up until this year it was just something to listen to. I've been playing Tenor Saxophone for 5 years ( I played Bassoon for my first year) in the school band. Last year I finally got hooked onto playing it, maybe its because I'm actually getting good. I did a solo and ensemble; scored well, also I made it into Symphonic Band. This is a more difficult band which I am now proud to be a member of.
This year I also bought myself an iPod Touch. Unlike my old iPod this can hold much much much more music. Now I am not afraid to put something weird or different on to it. I have the most verity on my iPod than all my friends. All music is enjoyable once you get to know it. Though I am not fond of some country and a lot of heavy metal. For some reason it gives me headaches.
This year I also found my new favorite thing. Concerts. My first memorable concert was in 7th grade, I believe. I saw Paolo Nutini at the Baramore in Madison. The sound was O.K but it was small, kinda low key, but memorable as being my first TURE concert. Fours year later (this year, 10th grade) I was asked to see Cloud Cult with my good friend Becca. This was her favorite band, it was an honer to go with her. This band had an Indie Rock sound to them with a very artistic show... literally artistic. In the show wile the band was playing their music two painters will apply paint to a canvas in the background, they painted with the music. In the beginning of the show you have no idea what they are painting and by the end the painting comes together beautifully. Apparently they auction them off at the end of the show. I thought it was pretty great.
A Sundance film came out this year that changed my view on music. The movie was called The Runaways. Before this movie I had never heard of The Runaways. But I did recognize a few of the songs played in the movie. It turns out Joan Jett (or as I knew her as, the writer of Bad Reputation and I Love Rock n' Roll) started the band The Runaways in 1975. The significant thing about this band is that it was the first ALL girl rock band. Once I saw this movie I fell in love. From then on it was Joan Jett this Joan Jett that. Then, an also Joan Jett lover and lover of the movie aka my best friend Rachael found out that Joan Jett and the Blackhearts were playing at summer feast we HAD to go. It was the best night of our lives. For both her, and now that I think of it for me too. We were as close as you can get to the stage. Right up against the fence. Joan Jett connected with her audience like no other. I can swear to.... my cats life.. that her and I made eye contact. I hope she saw the t-shirts we made for the concert ( all my idea), they looked awesome. A month later my pre-order of the movie came in the mail. I watched it 10 times in two weeks. No joke. And I still love it.
This was not my last concerts for sure. I have two concerts coming up. One thats happening on the 26th is a Ke$ha concert. I gave these tickets for a graduation gift for a friend. Work is getting in the way of our big plan, but at least we'll make it to the majority of the concert. Hopefully we wouldn't miss too much.
Then here comes the biggie. The concert that I bought tickets for, six months ahead of time. Tickets I spent $175.00 on. I am seeing the most famous, the biggest, the wildest, the one that everyone talks about, the one that I am in complete head over heals in love with, more than Joan Jett, more than my own boyfriend. The great Lady Gaga!!!! September 2nd at the Milwaukee Bradley Center at 8:00 pm I am seeing my biggest idol. For those of you out there that are laughing I would shut up if I were you. You have no idea how much of a musical artistic genius Lady Gaga is. Trust me I've done enough research to be considered a stalker. I have never been so excited for an event in my life. I scream at random occasions just thinking about it. This I am also seeing with Rachael.
But I have nightmares of missing the concert, of something going wrong, I am so afraid that the car will breakdown, that the seats have a bad view, that we get lost, traffic jam, sickness. There are just so many things that scare me. I picture bad things to happen so the good will actually happen. But now that I found out the secret what if it doesn't work, so i know I'm picturing the bad so something good happens so now the bad will happen. I am stuck in an unknowing triangle. A triangle of fear and disappointment. If I miss this concert it will be the definite ending of the happiest year of my life.
I've always liked music, but up until this year it was just something to listen to. I've been playing Tenor Saxophone for 5 years ( I played Bassoon for my first year) in the school band. Last year I finally got hooked onto playing it, maybe its because I'm actually getting good. I did a solo and ensemble; scored well, also I made it into Symphonic Band. This is a more difficult band which I am now proud to be a member of.
This year I also bought myself an iPod Touch. Unlike my old iPod this can hold much much much more music. Now I am not afraid to put something weird or different on to it. I have the most verity on my iPod than all my friends. All music is enjoyable once you get to know it. Though I am not fond of some country and a lot of heavy metal. For some reason it gives me headaches.
This year I also found my new favorite thing. Concerts. My first memorable concert was in 7th grade, I believe. I saw Paolo Nutini at the Baramore in Madison. The sound was O.K but it was small, kinda low key, but memorable as being my first TURE concert. Fours year later (this year, 10th grade) I was asked to see Cloud Cult with my good friend Becca. This was her favorite band, it was an honer to go with her. This band had an Indie Rock sound to them with a very artistic show... literally artistic. In the show wile the band was playing their music two painters will apply paint to a canvas in the background, they painted with the music. In the beginning of the show you have no idea what they are painting and by the end the painting comes together beautifully. Apparently they auction them off at the end of the show. I thought it was pretty great.
This was not my last concerts for sure. I have two concerts coming up. One thats happening on the 26th is a Ke$ha concert. I gave these tickets for a graduation gift for a friend. Work is getting in the way of our big plan, but at least we'll make it to the majority of the concert. Hopefully we wouldn't miss too much.
Then here comes the biggie. The concert that I bought tickets for, six months ahead of time. Tickets I spent $175.00 on. I am seeing the most famous, the biggest, the wildest, the one that everyone talks about, the one that I am in complete head over heals in love with, more than Joan Jett, more than my own boyfriend. The great Lady Gaga!!!! September 2nd at the Milwaukee Bradley Center at 8:00 pm I am seeing my biggest idol. For those of you out there that are laughing I would shut up if I were you. You have no idea how much of a musical artistic genius Lady Gaga is. Trust me I've done enough research to be considered a stalker. I have never been so excited for an event in my life. I scream at random occasions just thinking about it. This I am also seeing with Rachael.
But I have nightmares of missing the concert, of something going wrong, I am so afraid that the car will breakdown, that the seats have a bad view, that we get lost, traffic jam, sickness. There are just so many things that scare me. I picture bad things to happen so the good will actually happen. But now that I found out the secret what if it doesn't work, so i know I'm picturing the bad so something good happens so now the bad will happen. I am stuck in an unknowing triangle. A triangle of fear and disappointment. If I miss this concert it will be the definite ending of the happiest year of my life.
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| Rachael and I decked out in our rocker outfits. |
Sunday, August 22, 2010
8/22/10 You Know You Did It
This is a paper I wrote last year. The assignment was to write about a murder. It had to have been before or after not during. I took it into a little different perspective.
You Know You Did It
You look of it. You see of it. You feel of it, anger, adrenalin, rage, resentment, sorrow, guilt, and one big mistake. You're shaking and crying; you know what you did was wrong, bad, inhuman. Your scarlet paint stained blouse was what you called it; denial. It seemed right at the time, revenge was why. But was the cost worth a life? He was ruining yours, every day, picking at it like a scab; every time you recovered he would just make it bleed some more. His body lay there, still warm but motionless, lifeless. All you can do is stare. The world had not come to a stop; the birds still sang, the wind still blew, the sun still shined; nothing had happened. It wasn’t you, it was an accident, it was self-defense, you were at the store, you did it. The knife stays tight in your palms, your heart beating like a drum, your body pulses. You run, far away; to the next city, state, country, planet. No matter how far you go it’s always there, with you, in you, part of you, like a mountain to earth. Killer.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
8/21/10 The 411
So I'm just going to cut to the chase. I am 16 years old and have no good reason to start a blog. I'm not an international traveler, or going to try to cook through Julian Childs cookbook. No, I'm none of those things. Just some board teenage girl at 11 o'clock at night with some genius idea to start a blog. This may not last very long or it may become the only consistent thing in my life other than school and checking my Facebook. Yeah you guessed it I am the typical American teenager. For the most part. *11:11 MAKE A WISH!!....... (minute goes by)*.
Ok I'm back; and no I am not going to tell you what I wished for. If you were my dad though, we probably would have had the same wish. If you guessed find a job, and maybe you are one of those too; you were right. Lucky for me I have a job. Hence the name CheeseWiz I work at a cheese store called.. well.. Cheesers. Funny right? Most out-of- towners think thats cute ( I do too) some even take their picture in front of the store.
Here's the stats on Cheesers. We are a cut-to-size cheese shop. You tell us how much you want. I pull out a large block of cheese and do my best to get there. We have over 130 verities of cheese. We also carry 6 verities of Babcock Hall ice cream. This is ice cream is made up at the Madison University. It's the best, my favorite flavor is Orange Custard Chocolate Chip. I get paid $7.40 an hour. this is 20 cents above minimum wage and it is what I need to support my habits like going to movies, shopping with friends, eating out, or just getting random stuff at Walmart. Some times I save for something big like concert tickets. You will be hearing more about that later.
So the rules of the Blog are..... 1. No correcting grammatical errors. I usually will be writing after 10 at night because that's the only time I can write, but I miss a lot of little mistakes. And This is my Blog so I can make all the errors I want. Ha.
2. This Blog is about me. Im not writing it to educate people, I'm just writing to get thoughts out of my head.
3. If I talk about other people only first names will be used. I don't want people stalking other people through this.
4. It would be kinda cool if I had followers..... I would seem kinda important and all.
This is an ad I made for a class project. Its okay for a very rough draft. I would love to make it better... maybe even put it on local TV! ( dreaming to big... you think)
P.S Rule #1 is extremely important.
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