06/01/12 Gradroverted

      In two days I will be walking across the stage in a highly fashionable Viking Purple gown and a "mortarboard" of a hat. Now set free from high school, I am to make something of myself. The hardest part is not knowing were to begin. I mean, I had it all planned out to go to college, meet lots of friends, and party! That's what I want. Although there is something holding me back, over the past year I realized something about myself, it's something that is upsetting, and ruins my plans. I am shy, or an introvert, or both. I can't pin-point which yet, because both descriptions match me. One may wonder how it took 18 years to just be figuring this out, but the truth is I have been in denial. I just always thought that if I were someplace else I will be different, thinking the people that made me the way I am and not me. This upsets me most because I am well aware of being introverted or shy, and I don't want to be this way. I wish so much that I can be extroverted and out going, because at heart that is what I strive to be. I want to mingle, and yell, and do what ever extroverted people do. Going to college is scary, it's all about having the time of your life. I am trapped in my own head, caged by my thoughts. Hopefully I can find a way to set free before I watch my life go by.